The Road to Righteousness

I had an interesting, special experience yesterday. I debated about sharing it with anyone, let alone a cyber audience, but the nagging feeling that I should won't abate, so here we are.

It's been a hectic week or so. At work, we let the temp in our department go, and my bookkeeper quit without notice last Thursday, just as I was starting the re-build of our computer system. On top of that, my DH announced Thursday night (after he had forgotten about our anniversary...again...) that he was quitting his job the next day. I am grateful that I can recognize that all of these are not my problem. They may impact me, but they are not my problem. Here's why.

A few months ago, my BFF Wendi sent me a set of tapes/workbooks from a seminar she had attended. It's entitled "Becoming Spiritually Centered and Overcoming the World," by James B. Cox. At its core, its basic premise is that all of our problems are created, live and thrive in a "temporal," mortal world. All of the solutions to those problems, can be found in the "spiritual" world. 

The temporal world is where you eat, work, exercise, watch TV, go to church, pay bills. He points out that it takes very little effort to be(come) temporally centered. All problems are found in the temporal world. 

Bridging the two is your (personal) world: a physical body and a spiritual body, your temple (1 Cor. 6:19). The physical body is part of the temporal world. Your spirit is part of the spiritual world. The two faculties of this world are your heart and your mind. One can focus his/her thoughts so you you can become spiritually or temporally centered.

The spiritual world is where your best friends are: Heavenly Father, Heavenly Mother, the Savior, the Holy Ghost, angels. In this world you find the powers of the priesthood, high feelings of self worth, peace and joy, forgiveness of sins. The Holy Ghost, the revelator and comforter, operates in this dimension. All solutions to all problems are found by accessing this world.

His encouragement: when we are faced with difficulties, injustice etc., the faster we are able to shuck using the temporal world to obtain solutions, and seek the spiritual dimension to find solutions, the sooner we will be at peace and back on the road to righteousness. 

What he teaches is not something new to me, but the mechanics and logic of "why" you would want to do so, was eye-opening. I had a lot of opportunities to put this in practice this week. I opted for example, to not remain in darkness (anger) when the employees quit. I opted (consciously) to bask in anger Thursday night when DH told me he had quit his job, but I also made the conscious decision that I was only going to wallow until the morning, at which time I would let it go, and seek a spiritual solution. During those 12 hours, I also made a point of being in constant mini-prayer, expressing gratitude for the solutions and kindness the Almighty had already given me. I am grateful to apply the lesson I have already learned: DH has stewardship issues, meaning, a general inability or unwillingness (and I don't judge which it is) to fulfill stewardship assignments given to him by God. It doesn't matter whether he is asked to visit families in our church, teach a class, or provide for a family, he has developed a habit of dropping the stewardship ball. That's not my problem. That's his problem with the Lord. I don't ask him to shoulder those stewardship assignments, the Lord does. Therefore, the solution to fixing those issues is not mine, it is DH's and the Lord's.

Do you see the difference?

Friday morning as I was ready and prepared to let it go and Let God, of course, the Adversary did not want me to. He wanted me to stay in his world: anger, depression, 'righteous' indignation. But I knew that solutions to my problems aren't found there. I chose to start back to peace by expressing my gratitude. I am keenly aware that my God is aware of my DH's stewardship issues. Consequently, He blessed me with work in California which allowed me to fulfill my righteous goals of being a stay at home Mom, but also fulfilled my righteous desires of getting out of debt. He inspired me to look for a job in Texas while we were still in California, and then fixed it so that I could get that job (seriously, the guy made two other hires who came and went before he decided it was worth the spend (I'm not cheap) on me.) This job pays enough to support my family, and has some flexibility so my kids can continue to do homeschooling.

I choose to focus on the Lord's hand in my life, rather than Satan's. I am grateful to be able to discern the difference. It paved the way for the blessings I received yesterday.

Saturday (yesterday) we went to Oklahoma city to visit the temple of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. It's on my DD's bucket list, and since she just turned 19, we went as her birthday present. It's a bit of a drive: 4+ hours if mapquest doesn't send you on the back roads (5 if it does. Our drive took 5.)

Satan would have me believe that my life as a SAHM compared to what I could accomplish "in the world" has been a failure. After all: 3 of my 5 children are not where "I" would like them to be in life if I was writing their script. God wants me to know the truth: that "I" am not writing their script: they are, and the Lord is, but not me. It's easy to buy into the lie that "I" am a failure as a Mom, especially as a Chinese mom.

At the temple, I met a 70 year old woman who was attending the temple for the first time. At 70, she made the decision to travel a better road to righteousness. As I pondered my apparent failures as a mom, and also the fact that I am now out of the home for the majority of the day, the truth was revealed to me that I am not a failure in the Lord's eyes. I understood that in a few months, my daughter will also be visiting the temple for the first time; the scripture Luke 2:22-38 came to my mind. This is where Joseph and Mary present Christ to Simeon at the temple. I understood in just a few months I will be presenting my daughter, and escorting her back into the Lord's presence. Within the next few years, I will repeat this with both of my sons.

I am grateful for the revelation that the Lord is pleased with my efforts to be a righteous mother. Could I have done it better? Can I do it better? Of course. But my efforts to be a righteous parent do not go unnoticed by the Lord, and they are appreciated. I am grateful for the vision that in a temple we see life go full circle: I will be able to bring my children to a temple, just like Mary and Joseph, present them to the Lord's representative just as they did, ask for them to return to the Lord's presence, and have that wish granted. What greater gift can a mother have?

They say the road to hell is paved with good intentions. I say, the road to righteousness is paved with good decisions. I am grateful for the chance to choose better ones every day.